Men need respect & women need love. If we simply learn to meet the one main need that our spouse has then we may eliminate many other battles or problem areas.
Ephesians 5:33 Nevertheless let each one of you in particular so love his own wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.
This is all that Eric needs to either make him or break him as a man. When I show him that I respect him he is stronger but when I disrespect him, especially in front of people, he is a broken man with no power at all. As women we don't realise the importance of our respect, it either releases our husband into his full potential as a man or without it we cripple our man & make him unable to be what God has called him to be. Here are some tips for wives:
1) Go to God - he already has all the answers & will very happily help you
2) Watch Your Words - communicate only words of life that will build him up, if you have any complaints just shut up & chat to God about it. If you are creative you can use positive words to have what you need in your marriage, this will build him up & at the same time you will be able to have what you need too. For example rather than nagging & complaining that he never washes the dishes rather say something like, "Darling I really love it when you help me around the house, it makes me feel so important to you, I especially would like it if sometimes you helped with the dishes". I am not talking about manipulation or control here, don't misunderstand the heart you need to have behind your words. You are simply communicating your needs in a positive way rather than in a nagging, controlling way. There is not a man alive on this planet who likes nagging. This way you can still show him respect but also tell him what you need.
3) Support Him - be passionate about what he is passionate about. Eric is passionate about his guitar so I have taken the time over the years to learn about the guitar & other music stuff. He is a brilliant guitarist, the best in the world in my eyes & although I have been careful not to let this define him I have done my best to make music a big part of our life. If Eric was into racing motor cars then I would be out in the garage right now passing him tools to help him get ready for a race. If Eric was into golf I would be on the green right now passing him a wedge. I am sure you get the picture... don't take what he is passionate about and hold it against him rather be a part of it if he wants you to & if he doesn't want you to be a part of it give him space & time to get on with it.
Do you have any tips for either husbands or wives? I would love to hear your thoughts but most of all these are just some tips to help us, I get it wrong more often than I get it right so don't feel bad if you still have some work to do, I do too so let's work on our marriages together :) If you are reading this and are not married you can still practice, the way you treat men in general in your every day life is probably how you will treat your own husband one day. Start showing respect to the men in your world & see how you will release their potential.
I think this is really accurate. Respect does release potential. Well done for capturing such an important subject with such simple words.ReplyDelete