8.3.21

A Relationship Is Not a Destination But a Journey.

Families that play together stay together!Relationships of any kind can be incredibly rewarding and equally challenging. One thing that really robs us of good relationships is unrealistic expectations, especially those that we have absorbed from the movies! 

We watch beautiful romantic stories at the cinema and hope for something similar or watch a sitcom like Friends and wish we could have such fun friendship circles. But truth be told, the relationships both personal and professional that we see on our screens are for entertainment purposes and shouldn't build our definition and expectation of the relationships that we hope to have in real life. 

Our society is very much accustomed to getting things quickly and instantly these days. 3-minute microwave meals, instant text messaging and an entire life story in a 90-minute movie. I can't help but wonder if we expect our relationships to be perfect instantly and when they are not we give up and move onto the next one.

A relationship is not a destination but a journey.

We want the finished product but God gives us the raw materials to build with. He didn't give us chairs and tables, he gave us trees! He didn't give us clothes he gave us cotton, leather, wool, and silk. He also didn't give us trees fully grown or children as adults, it all starts smalls and grows from a tiny seed. So why do we expect a relationship to be fully grown and fully formed when it starts - that goes against everything we know about how God does things.

God gives us the opportunity to grow a relationship and to work on it until it's fully formed. It can be a rewarding and exciting journey as people come together with this understand and mindset. They agree to be patient with each other as they get to know each other and help bring out the best in each other. When one shows weakness or lack of character the other can point it out lovingly or gentle cover it and allow God to highlight it in His time. 

Imagine how beautiful the world would be if we had realistic expectations of our relationships and went into them with a commitment to grow the relationship from seed form to maturity. 

Would you join me in building quality relationships as best we can? One of the things we like to do to build our family relationship is play games - families that play together stay together! What do you enjoy doing to get to know people and build relationships? I would love to hear your thoughts and ideas so we can all learn and grow together :) Building quality relationships take time so enjoy the journey.


Love

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20.2.21

With Jesus I have Enough

#iwd2021 #choosetochallenge

As I sit here pondering on all I need to do to build this amazing business I'm building I am acutely aware that 24 hours in a day is not enough, in fact, one lifetime is simply not enough to pull this off! I am deeply passionate about what I do and equally fearful that I can't do what I want to do. 

Then I'm reminded of the story of the 5 loaves and 2 fish from Matthew 14:13-21. It wasn't enough. The disciples couldn't not feed the hungry multitudes with these few pieces of food. They even calculated that they would need at least 8 month's wages if they were to pop into town to buy food. The lack baffled them. I can just see them scratching their heads and looking at Jesus when he said, 

“They do not need to go away. You give them something to eat.”

“We have here only five loaves of bread and two fish,” they answered.

“Bring them here to me,” he said.

And the rest, as we know is history, miraculous history. Jesus took the not enough, gave thanks and broke it. Somewhere in the breaking of the bread became enough, in fact, it became more than enough, because there were 12 baskets of leftovers.

My encouragement for you today is to understand that the breaking is essential to the multiplication. If you feel broken. If you feel like your life is being ripped to piece. If you feel like everything is coming apart, put on some happy music and dance around like never before, because you are heading to a more than enough place. You are in the multiplication process. What you're about to see is more than you can ever have asked for or imagined!

My prayer for you and I today is that we will remember to take our not enough and bring it to Him. In His hands, it will be enough. 

Lord, I place my 24 hours in your hands today, in faith, knowing that it's not enough to do what I need to do in one lifetime, but in your hands, it's more than enough.

Now you, you pray you're not enough into His hands and see what He will do. I would love to hear what He does, please leave me a comment below so we can celebrate together.

Just remember, it could take time, multiplication is not always instant and there were instructions give that day, perhaps these instructions apply to you too.

  1. "He directed the people to sit down on the grass." Are you very busy running around or is your mind constantly racing? Perhaps you need to sit down on the grass, in fact Mark even calls it the green grass, ring any bells? Take a moment to sit down, listen to what he has to say to you.

  2. "He broke the loaves." Are you willing to allow Jesus to break something in your life, break it into little pieces? Surrender that which you are holding onto and allow Him to break it.
Watch this space, I am expecting my miracle with my not enough 24 hours in His hands, what have you placed in His hands? Let's pray for each other and believe in what God can do.

Love

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14.1.21

Date Night Game - Love Snap

Love Snap

Eric and I started having a weekly date night very early on in our marriage when we discovered that we worked all the time and had stopped having fun together. We love working together and if we didn't intentionally prioritise romance, we could easily slip into being business partners and good friends... which is dangerous for any marriage - romance is important! 

So to keep the romantic spark alive and ensure that we keep dating and enjoying each other, we set aside Wednesday evenings for date night.

16 years of marriage flew by, date night remained fixed in place on Wednesday evenings throughout these years but it had slowly drifted into a default steak and movie night. So I came up with a bright idea, rather than being stuck in a rut let's spice things up a bit! Let's take turns to plan date night each week. So we set up a routine where we would alternate who prepares date night each week and part of the night has to include some sort of activity that will enrich our marriage.

This was the best idea ever and we have never looked back! Date night is now the highlight of my week again, it's always fun and it's so lovely to see what we come up with each week.

Eric and I have both been caught searching the internet for date night ideas and have found there to be very little out there, so we decided that it would be a good idea for us to share our ideas! So it's with great pleasure that we introduce our Date Night series right here on my King's Daughters blog. I can't wait to share some of the fun games we have come up with. Now, before we take all the credit, I must confess, Eric and I both pray like made for creative ideas, and I believe many of these are God-inspired or we would have run out of ideas long ago!

Last week's night date night almost flopped - badly! Despite praying throughout the day I had nothing! No great ideas, no inspiration and to be honest, not much love in my heart, it was just a meh day that carried over into a meh date night. It was my turn to prepare and other than a lovely dinner I was fresh out of inspiration. So I put on a nice fireplace scene on the TV since we don't have a log fireplace in our current home and my plan was just to hang out and chat. We seldom get a chance to just relax and chat so I thought it would be a good idea.

Bad idea!

It went horribly wrong, the conversation didn't flow and I ended up feeling like a complete failure. As I sat feeling sorry for myself I prayed and said,

"God please help me find my way back and somehow not completely flop this date night."

Crickets... God seemed silent!

Then I suddenly had this idea;

"Do you want to play cards?"

Not a very original idea but Eric said yes and at least we were connecting and we had a bit of fun with rummy until the big idea hit! Love Snap! Oh my goodness we had so much fun. I haven't laughed so much in ages or felt so loved. It was a definite winner so I will share the rules with you. Give it a go, I promise you, you will have so much fun!

LOVE SNAP

Buy a traditional pack of cards here.
Play according to the usual snap rules with a twist. 
Every time there is a heart 'snap' you shout out LOVE instead of SNAP and the winner has to tell the other person what they love about them.

Yes, it sounds super cheesy but it's oh so much fun. Give it a try and let me know what you think. 

Love

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15.5.19

The Closer You Get The Brighter The Light Shines!



I was born again in 1991 and I will never forget the moment that the pastor asked me if I thought I was a good person. My reply was a confident, "Yes". At that time, an unwed, pregnant, seventeen-year-old teenager who had not finished high school and done just about all the naughty stuff that a teen could have done, but I thought I was a good person. I have since learned that this is a common response from most people.

"A person may think their own ways are right, but the LORD weighs the heart." - Proverbs 21:2

Now, 28 years later, I feel like more of a sinner than I ever have. The more I get to know Jesus the brighter His light seems to shine on me, and on all my imperfections. The thing about this is that when He shines his light on my character flaws I don't feel bad or guilty, I feel His love and am inspired to work on them and become a better person.

The Bible says, "Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect." in Matthew 5:48 and I have never quite understood what that means as the entire Bible is proof that we cannot be perfect surely. The Greek word for perfect in this verse is teleios which means 'brought to its end' and finished. It also means 'wanting nothing necessary to completeness' and fully grown adult.

So, in my understanding, the Bible isn't telling us to be perfect instantly but that we are to grow into maturity in Him and thankfully we also have the amazing verse that says that we are clothed in His righteousness so we are also perfect instantly too on the day we accept Jesus into our life.

"God made him who had no sin to be sin for us, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God." - 2 Corinthians 5:21

So I am both perfect already because of Jesus and still growing into perfection as I walk with him. As the light shines more brightly on me and I see more of my imperfections I am encouraged by how far I have come but also challenged about becoming even better.

Where are you in your walk towards perfection? I would love to hear your views, struggles and any questions that you might have.

Love

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8.5.19

GO!

This past Saturday I had the honour of preaching at the Alabaster Women's Conference in Leicester.

My message is simple - it can be summed up in one word. This one word, in fact, it is only two letters, has the potential to change the entire word. These two letters can change your life today if you are willing to apply them and take action. The word is GO!

And He said to them, “Go into all the world and preach the gospel to every creature. He who believes and is baptized will be saved; but he who does not believe will be condemned. And these signs will follow those who believe: In My name they will cast out demons; they will speak with new tongues; they will take up serpents; and if they drink anything deadly, it will by no means hurt them; they will lay hands on the sick, and they will recover.” - Mark 16:15-18

This is our mandate as Christians - to GO!

Watch the video below



I would love to hear from you, leave me a comment below with your thoughts on this or any questions you might have.

Love

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25.4.19

The Journey Begins

Right, now that the hardest part is over, and that was getting the first post written, taking the plunge and getting back into this blog, I begin the journey of reading through the last ten years of posts - 650 in total! My next post was a book review. This reminded me of much I used to love reading and how little I read these days. My business, Women's Business Club, has pretty much taken over my life and this is not a good thing. Part of getting back into my blog is to try and find me again, to find what I love outside of business and to take those parts of my life back. Reading is one of those areas that has been sorely neglected.

The book I reviewed was God Chicks by Holly Wagner. The highlight of this post is that Holly actually wrote to us and left us a comment which I treasure.

I might just really get into reading again so have bought Warrior Chicks too, I never did get around to reading that one so will do so now. As I placed my order on Amazon it occurred to me that part of what moulded me back in those days was who I followed online. They say that your life is influenced by the books you read and the people you spend time with. I would go one step further in this day and age and say that your life is also influenced by the people you follow online. So I am going to go back to my influencers of 10 years ago and sign up to their blogs too and see what there is to see! I used to love following Holly Furtick and Holly Wagner - ha ha just noticed that they are both Hollys. It seems Holly Furtick doesn't have a blog anymore but only an Instagram, how the world has changed so quickly.

OK, so where am I at now? I think I am burned out but still trying really hard to keep going. Deep down inside I know I need to stop and have a complete rest from everything but that is easier said than done. Today I spoke to someone for business advice and was told that I am more successful than I realise. This was really encouraging. At the same time, right now, as I write, I feel totally shattered and cannot find the strength to get through the days. Is success supposed to feel this bad?

So my journey begins, the journey of finding me again amidst the weight of success. Perhaps this post doesn't make sense but some of you will totally get how I feel. I would love to hear from you, where are you at in your life's journey, how do you feel right now? Perhaps you are in a new beginning and feeling fresh and alive or perhaps you have been hard at work for many years and feel totally wiped out or maybe you are somewhere in between. I would love to hear your story and how you are feeling right now so we can go on this journey together.

Love

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28.3.19

Back to the Beginning

I'm not sure where to begin but I know that I need to start somewhere. 10 years ago on 13th April 2009 I penned my very first post on this blog. My audience was the women of our brand new baby church, D7 Church and the message was identity, knowing who we are as daughters of the King. My only intention for writing was to encourage our women on their faith journey and in their everyday ordinary life. Little did I know what the years ahead would hold and how much of a rollercoaster ride life was to become. I have written here through most of it, there have been some quiet spots with an attempt at a post in the dark seasons.

Today I come back full circle as I explore my own writings, try to make sense of the journey I have been on with the hope that I will find a way forward. Most of all, with all my heart I believe that there is a purpose to the past ten years and it wasn't all for nothing!

My audience from today is me.  If you happen to be reading this, then you too and I hope that you find encouragement from my reflections or perhaps only a little entertainment! My message remains the same, identity. For me, identity remains the most important message of all time. Who am I? What is my purpose? What should I be doing with my life? To answer these questions I need to know the One who made me. All becomes clearer as I spend time with the One who made me. It is in this precious time that I feel peace and my purpose once again becomes clearer.

This year, as I spent time with God, I felt clearly that the name of 2019 is Less is More and thus far this has been my guiding phrase, when in doubt I simply ask, does this fit in with Less is More. It has helped me shape my business and more importantly helped me to get back to the simple things in life which I enjoy, one of them being writing here in my blog, a simple pleasure that I have neglected for far too long.

So what does back to the beginning mean to me? Well, I am going to start by getting back to the place where I felt closest to God and where life made the most sense and that means starting to read my own writing from my very first post and retracing my footsteps through the past 10 years to try and make some sense of it all. There has been so much good but equally so much hurt and pain. I have become a completely different person because of it so almost need to start exploring my identity once again. Not because my core identity has changed but because there is a whole new layer of understanding. God has stripped away, humbled and exposed parts of me, some good and some not so good. He has been hard at work moulding me, chipping away the bad bits and polishing up the good bits. I truly am a new creation, evidence of what a good God can do with a bad girl. He started His incredible work in me way back on 1st March 1991, 28 years ago when I was a very lost and broken pregnant seventeen year old! Wow, what a journey I've been on. I don't feel the need to go that far back, if you would like to hear about those days read some of my books as I reveal all in Hope's Journey, Secure on the Rock and Passion & Purity. I will pick up with His more recent work from the past 10 years and see where this takes me.

I have no idea where this will take me but if you would like to join me on this journey, share your stories, ask questions and pray for each other, please feel free to do so by leaving comments in the box below. So here we go, back to the beginning...

Love

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