My Centre, The Place Where I am Me

As you may  have noticed, I have been spending a lot of time in the business world this year.  God has called me and anointed me for business, as a minister in the business world, and it has been an incredible journey.  Since preaching on this very subject one year ago in our church, my whole life has changed.  I resisted God for about six months as I did not want to go back into the business world, the failure of my first company was a deep disappointment and I was convinced that I was not a business woman.  God saw things differently.  My resistance crumbled and He had His way - thank goodness!

I have seen the most incredible things happen as a result and I know that God uses the foolish things to confound the wise. I always say to God that I am willing to be the foolish thing in his hand.  I am good at that - being nothing and allowing Him to be everything.  So as a result of all the wonderful and scary things that have happened this year, Women's Business Club was born.

In the midst of becoming the woman that I was born to be, I also discovered that I often became confused and frightened.  My goals are audacious, my steps are on water and my view of myself is still small.  I know who I am and I know who God is and I am never confused about that.  Any good in me is because of what God has done in me and because of His great grace that has redeemed the mess that I once made of my life.  There is no confusion in this area - I am clothed in His righteousness and I live by grace alone.  However, I have learned to be confident and although I feel a great deal of fear this fear never stops me, I do it anyway.

The reason I am writing to you today is because I want you to know how I do it, I want to share a secret with you about how the business world does not corrupt me and how my identity stays in tact and most of all how I avoid pride.  My secret is this:  daily I find my centre.  I start each day by making sure that I go to that place that I know to be true and the only word I can use to describe it is my centre.

Let me explain.  It is in this place where I feel that I am truly me.  Here everything makes sense. This is the only place where I make sense.  My peace comes from this place.  My joy comes from this place. My confidence comes from this place.  I cry in this place.  I am filled with hope in this place.  I am cleansed in this place. Without finding my centre every day I would easily lose my way and possibly even lose my God.  Satan is sublte and he knows how to seduce us and gently lead us away from God.  I know, I have fallen victim to his snares many times in the past. We are not safe if we depend on our own strength to avoid this very real enemy.  I know I am just as vulnerable as the next person.  My centre is my safety net.

So what is my centre?  I don't want to say God.  I mean, yes it is God, but it is not just Him, it is me too.  It is a place where we connect.  My centre is when I choose to find God.  Daily.  It's not a religious act.  God will not be displeased if I miss a day, or two.  In fact, some days I do.  My centre is a place that I chose to go to, as often as possible, usually in the morning.  My centre is where I find my God and spend time with Him.  It is here that everything makes sense once again.  It is here that I feel most like me.

How do I do find God?  Well, the way I find God and the way you find God will be completely different.  There is no recipe or formula, most importantly there is no right or wrong.  If you don't know how to find your centre yet then try various things until you find what works for you.  For me, I make a cuppa coffee and some cereal, sit in my living room and to start off with I listen to the Bible using my Bible app on my phone.  I don't hear 90% of it because I am still half asleep but it is a wonderful way to wake up slowly and get in the 'zone'.  Once I have finished my breakfast I put on my current favourite Christian song - I Surrender by Hillsong and then I close my eyes and just sing, listen, talk to God or whatever I want to do.  I try not to cry, but have never yet succeeded in being in His presence and not crying.  I cry when I repent of my sin, it cleanses me.  I cry when I feel Him near, it humbles me.  I cry with tears of joy when I remember how much He loves me.  Well, if you know me, you probably know I cry a lot anyway about just about everything.

And then, after I have cried it all out I just sit and listen to whatever He has to say to me.  Sometimes there is just silence, we sit in silence, but I don't want to leave - His presence is so powerful and so wonderful.   Other times He speaks.  His voice sounds like my own thoughts, there is not an audible voice that I hear.  Somehow I know it is Him and not my thoughts.  I think it is something inside, the way I feel when He speaks, that helps me to know it is Him.  Most of all, His voice is always loving and kind.  Even when He corrects me and tells me about something I did wrong, I never feel bad I just feel loved.

I wanted to share this with you today, it's difficult to explain, but I hope that between my awkward words that you have found encouragement and perhaps some keys to help you find and keep your centre.  Don't let the things of this world corrupt you - these things are small and insignificant in the grand scheme of things.  Knowing God is the most important thing you could ever do with your life - everything good flows from that place of simply knowing Him.