-->

23.4.13

Being a Friend - Who Judges Herself

Did you know that if you judge someone else you are bringing judgement upon yourself? Yes it’s true and it’s a scary thought.  Also, the measure that you use to judge will be used back on you.  Not only that, but if we compare ourselves to other people we are told by God that we are not wise.
    I don’t know about you, but judging and comparing ourselves is just what we naturally do as girls! We are born that way.  From the earliest age I can remember judging others and comparing myself to other people.  We are taught to compare and compete at school, we are taught to judge.  It seems to be the ‘acceptable’ thing!  But not according to God’s standard.  His ways are higher than ours and if we are parents we should not conform to the world’s ways, we should save our children from the judgement of God by teaching them to show mercy to others from a young age.  So let’s take a look at God’s ways.

Matthew 7:1-2
“Judge not, that you be not judged. For with what judgment you judge, you will be judged; and with the measure you use, it will be measured back to you.

Ouch!  That says it just as it is, no need to try and find the hidden meaning in that, it’s very plain to see.

James 2:13
For judgment is without mercy to the one who has shown no mercy. Mercy triumphs over judgment.

This one is plain to understand too!  We need to show mercy to people and not judge them.  Mercy wins, judgement loses.  If we don’t show mercy to others we will not receive mercy from others and from God!  This is a very serious matter.  I don’t know about you but I need mercy both from other people and from God.  I need mercy all the time.
    I have found the best way to keep things in perspective is to NEVER think of myself more highly than I ought to.  Keeping things in perspective is essential and if I even begin to feel pride creep into my heart I know that I am thinking too highly of myself.  If you are aware of pride it is easy to spot in your own life, so cultivate awareness and choose to keep yourself humble for God and before others.

Romans 12:3
For I say, through the grace given to me, to everyone who is among you, not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think, but to think soberly, as God has dealt to each one a measure of faith.

So how do we view others then?  It’s easy, yet again plain put in the Bible.  We view others better than ourselves.

Philippians 2:3
Let nothing be done through selfish ambition or conceit, but in lowliness of mind let each esteem others better than himself.

Esteem means regard, respect, appreciate or value.  We need to regard people better than us, respect them as better than us, appreciate them as better than us and value them as better than us.
    Also, it doesn’t say to esteem only good people or worthy people, it just says people.  So next time you walk past a drunk person don’t look down at him and think yourself better than him because you are not drunk – you are not better than him.  Or if you walk past a mum shouting at her child in the street, don’t look down at her thinking that you are better than her because your child is behaving and you aren’t shouting – you are not better than her.
    We are in no position to judge, we have no idea why people are the way they are, we can’t begin to understand their heart and we most certainly don’t have it all figured out ourselves.  If we truly want to live in God’s grace we need to judge ourselves only.

1 Corinthians 11:28
But let a man examine himself...

1 Corinthians 11:31
For if we would judge ourselves, we would not be judged.

It’s essential that we judge ourselves if we want to become the women that God wants us to be and the friends that our friends need us to be.  Judging ourselves does not mean comparing ourselves to each other.  We judge ourselves according to the Bible, God’s handbook for life!  God has set the standard for living and we need to do our best to measure up.  We shouldn’t feel condemned  when we realise we don’t measure up, we simply need to know what to aim for.
    When it comes to being a friend we need to make sure we intentional stop judging our friends and start to judge ourselves.  Not only will be become a much better friend but our friends will also feel safe with us.  There is nothing more hurtful and soul destroying that knowing that your friends judge you and talk behind your back about it.  Decide today to become a friend who will only judge herself.  

Find out more about Being a Friend here or about using our material to host your own Girl's Night here.

No comments:

Post a Comment